Genuine Care Says Something: Here is How.

I sometimes find myself in conversation with others and I have an internal conversation about whether or not I should verbalize an idea in my mind. Are you with me?

I just wrote a post about caring for people and on that same strand, care can become a way of measuring when to speak truth into someones life.

As you sit and listen to the stories of others how do you calibrate whether you speak truth, acquiesce, challenge, submit, or any other route you could take…what cues do you follow?

Clarity to this question comes easily when you measure the degree of pain or hurt that can be caused to the person speaking and the degree you care about that pain in their life.

If it will hurt that person and you care about that person you will most likely say something….did not say anything…you probably don’t care about them as you think.

You may say you’re calibrating…sounds like an excuse.


if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”


Or, is the better truth, if have something that may not seem nice but is actually for the persons growth….you have an obligation to communicate it…with tact.

Truth may not always be recognized as helpful but its good.

Truth may not always feel comfortable but its necessary.

Truth may not always mean restoration or reconciliation, but its part of how we grow.

How do you approach conflict…tentatively? aggressively? too aggressively?




One thought on “Genuine Care Says Something: Here is How.

  • This is so true. I think when we set truth and love at odds with one another we often do it to make ourselves comfortable. I know I certainly have in the past, and probably will in the future. Like telling the truth is not loving. And being loving means avoiding the need to say what’s real. But like you say, the reality is we are to speak the ‘truth in love’. They are not diametrically opposed. They are one with each other. Sometimes the most loving thing is to tactfully express uncomfortable realities. I guess the challenge is to cultivate relationships that are honest, loving and meaningful enough to endure the ‘faithful wounds of a friend.’

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